For the first time yesterday, a lady at the grocery store asked if I was "with child"....she actually wasn't a lady, she was young, maybe high school or college age. I was so caught off guard and embarrassed but then left with a big smile on my face because what to me felt like a chubby belly is turning into a baby belly. I don't think I would ever dare ask someone at this point if they were pregnant...I actually don't think I would ever ask because once I would be confident enough, it would just be so obvious the question would probably be more offensive at that point. It was a bold move but she lucked out.
Nobody really talks about how wonderful being pregnant is. Which I understand why....memories of the first trimester exhaustion and sickness doom and all of the champagne and margaritas I can't have, I never wanted to be pregnant again. But now, as my belly grows and this little baby inside of me gets bigger and busier, it is just the sweetest. I had absolutely no idea how often I would feel him moving. I always thought the little kicks that soon to be mamas would have you rush over to feel were a rare occurance. It's not like that at all, it is constant, and it is wonderful. I fall asleep every night with my hands on my belly trying to figure out what he is doing, what I feel, how he is positioned and just smiling at how wild he is. I then wake up to Js hand on my belly as he says good morning before he goes to work.
I am getting to know his routine and looking forward to it. I look forward to the evenings when he is the busiest and I get to sit with my hands on my belly and just feel him. It makes me sad during the day when he is still. Sometimes I will realize I haven't noticed him move for what feels like all day and I get very nervous, waiting for that reassuring kick.
I have had the easiest pregnancy. I am very blessed and I know this. I wasn't working when I was going through the hardest part, it has hardly interrupted my life, (other thank sparkles consumption) and the baby and I have been so healthy and strong the entire time. Doctors visits have been the easiest and sweetest and always a good report. I know I will only get more uncomfortable from here on out, I am in the easiest part of my pregnancy right now. Driving and sleeping are already becoming uncomfortable, my back and hips are starting to feel the burden and often I get up to fast or lift something too heavy and those lower abdominal muscles get very angry and painful.
I have no anxiety, fear, or worry. I have not read a single book about being pregnant or having a baby, I have not taken a single class. To me it is just natural, my body was built to bring a baby into the world, and it will happen either way. I have no expectations of my delivery. If I can be strong and do it completely natural that would great, I will give myself a pat on the back...if not, that is ok and I am sure I will be very happy to alleviate the pain. Either way, I am just excited for this little boy to be here. I pray constantly that he is healthy and perfect, but I know God has already ordained all of his days in His book and I am ready for that story, whatever it may be.
I love to think about how God is knitting him together in my womb, and how he is fearfully and wonderfully made. "Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." It is something wonderful to know that God is perfectly creating this little baby how he pleases...I cannot wait to see what He has decided. So if you have been curious or wondering how my pregnancy is going...there you have it. It's wonderful.